Impossible?

So yeah, here's a new one. I've thinking over it a lot. And, where am I? Nowhere. Because, forgetting all the memories of the past 3 years are not easy to forget, rather not possible for me. Future. I've always heard a lot, think about your future, study, how'll you get a job? But this time, it all changed, completely. Thinking about OUR future. I cannot really say anything about it, but yes I know, its very much possible, if there is commitment from both the sides involved.! In the 21st century, mindsets, people and the world have definitely changed a lot. For me everything has. My life seems kind of empty, everything I do, related to the one person. I throw something in the dustbin, yeah I remember saying " I'll throw the gift in the dustbin!", when I see a cat, I remember the cute little gift I got, when I talk about love. Its JUST the one person, and flashbacks do not stop, they just don't. I must actually thank her for what she's made me. A good person, away from all the crap of Alcoholic drinks and stuff, I really do. :) However, I don't want it to end. Cos deep down, even she knows, that staying apart? Dude you kidding me? :) 3 Years, and there's been this bond, this addiction , which cannot separate us. And I also know things have not changed, they never will. You know why? Cos if there is attachment from only one side too, Love exists :) It does. I wont act like the others going around defaming her, or talking crap, I will wait, and that's what I have finally decided. I will wait. She'll be back. EVERY SINGLE person who knows about it, says yes, its meant to be. See it in the eyes. There is a hell lot of pressure on her , I suppose. Moms trust. Yeah, its important but there is something called Personal Life? Which nobody would tell you not to have. All the parents go through the same stages of love too, and its right.  I still keep the first Rose I got with me, all the chocolates, the teddy, just to remind me - Aman, its a bad phase, bad time, bad luck, but she's gonna return soon :) Few friends also support me, but right now I'm all alone, and I have to keep struggling on the battlefield of Love. I know. There is one thing I've learnt since childhood, and it kind of runs in my blood now - Never Give Up. Because only I know, how special this relationship is, how we've spent time together, laughed, cried, reminiscing about everything. Its gonna be good, I just hope and she realizes. Which she will, pretty soon :) Einstein :* Its just a tough phase, and there's gonna be an end to it. No matter how much we ignore it, its ultimately troubling in the form of memories, and ultimately.- yeah :) Back together. Cos even she cannot deny the fact she needs me, I need her, and yes there was love. Still is :) 

I'm just waiting. And I will keep on ... I got a lot of time. :p Only for her, though. The day she comes back into my arms, that's the day, the real Aman will be back ;) Cos for now, a part of me is lost, far away, and I'm in search for it :)

Bhagwaan Ji, aap usse waapas le aoge na? :) I love you.

The Turbulence.....

" Will you be mine forever?"

Some words in life, always leave a deep impression on your hearts. When you lose somebody, you actually realize what they meant to you. The last two months have been really disturbing, full of fights and misunderstandings. I never wanted anything to end. Why is it when you really want to trust someone, just do everything you can, and it just shatters. Nails are hammered into your heart. Well, its not weird to be caring and maybe possessive , but until the other one understands whom it is for , its useless. Nothing matters, just what you do, how you act, how you care, how you take it matters. But, trusting immediately after it has been broken isn't easy. Is it? Not it my case atleast. Just a little more time would do, really. :| 12th August and 16th February will definitely be two days which I wont ever forget :) Like two really crazy, and life changing days. Tell me something? Its very difficult to be friends after you've been in Love with somebody? Right? If no, there is something really wrong with me. Watching it falling apart, and I cannot do anything. I guess I haven't been so helpless ever. My worst nightmare has now come true, and there is this bond which I have made. I can feel thoughts, see things, I don't know how. But there are surely a number of things I'm definitely gonna miss. Its been a long time and there an uncountable number of memories we've had. Good & Bad. Whenever I think about it, all of it plays, just like a movie stored in my mind, and I break down. Well, things I'm gonna miss? Lets try -
1) Whenever I'd be upset, the only hug in the world which made me forget all the tensions and worries.
2) The phone talks, the crazy stuff we talked about, and how we never wanted it to end.
3) The few times we out to hang out, man i'm gonna miss the metro so much.
4) I'm surely gonna look for the one person whenever I go to Lajpat Nagar :(
5) The scolding each other on small issues and then cutely saying, "I'm sorry, Pyaar se he bola tha na?"
6) Telling to eat on time, which I already miss.
7) Leaving beautiful love messages on facebook, just to make the other one feel special, even at night, I then slept so peacefully!
8) Fighting over who loves the other one more, mai, nahi mai na yr, mai , nahi na baba, :(
9) The over 19,000 + messages I have on facebook! I'm missing it.
10) The gifts we gave each other, eating from each others hands, the best thing.
11) Waiting for each other during dispersal to walk down together for sometime.
12) Holding hands.
13) Scolding a person if he by mistakes hits our beloved :)
14) Motu and Pagal, HP and Jumbo. The few special things.
15) The time we spent together, which kind of ran.
16) Caring so much! That if the other person is hurt, you feel the pinches in your body, seeing it in each others eyes.
17) Secretly meeting each other on stairs, classes and during break.
18) Bringing cards, making handmade cards :(
19) The scoldings I got and I listened to, when I did something wrong. She'd stop talking to me.
20) All the promises we made to each other......
21) I love you. THE MOST> :(

Its all falling apart, and I wanna mend it, start over. I just need a chance, cos I know its meant to be.
- H.P <3

2 Most Amazing days in the past year!

Hellooo lovely ladies out there ;) and the dashing gentlemen too :) I never have been partial you know. Congratulations to the Red house on their victory in the BSF. BSF ? That reminds of you everytime this word runs in my mind! This girl, the weirdest and the most different kind of girl I've ever met. Makes my heart run so fast whenever i see her, i wonder if it'll fail one day :P Love u know, makes u go crazy. The same happened with me, but an adventurous love story has been playing till now so no worries. So, this was her first BSF and I was happy that I'm gonna see her perform on stage :) I know she worked very hard, i could see that on her face whenever i saw her in the practices. She gives these cute expressions you know :) When the day she had to perform on came, I wondered if I was looking at an angel or a princess? :/ I just could not make up my mind. She was looking gorgeous ! <3 Trust me on this! And as i care sooo much for her, its obvious I wanted her to win. Waiting in the auditorium, thinking when will you fools get outta here and let HER perform?

I fell asleep in between the function, but suddenly my friend woke me up. As i looked up, I saw a face, looking nervous and innocent! And I was smiling throughout the performance, just didn't look at anybody else in her group, coz i was just so busy looking at her! There's something different, which attracts me, making me protect her, love her and be with her, always. Her DREAMS are so cool, I feel like converting them into reality, but this time , shez gotta do it :)

It went fabulous according to me. The next day, I went to school early. I was just wondering if she'd like to sit with me today as there were the Photography, Drama and Poetry performances on that day (BORING). :P

Just went up to my best mate, David (his nickname ;) asking him if I should ask her. He looked at me as if I was an alien belonging to another planet. Shouted "Ofcourse ass!" and I said "Lets do it". I went to the water cooler just to get fresh :P coz i was on a mission! She walked up to the water cooler on her own asking if I'd like to sit with her. Well, at that moment, I stared at her, thinking, "Is she mad or am I mad?" I know that's stupid :P So I said yes and went to her class to receive her. Went down, sat in her house line, taking the risk of being caught by my class teacher who was sitting right beside me! Lines were being adjusted and she was shifted far ahead of me. Felt like shouting W*F? Finally, after some time we were sitting beside each other, talking, sharing things , DREAMS and me as always teasing her :) 4 hours together. Do u have any idea what that means :/ Random stupid things also happened, but in such a unique love story what the HELL DO U EXPECT? :P Okay, so we went home, chatted, making plans for the next day and it was good

Next day i.e today were the results. Well, unfortunately she didn't win, and while the entire crowd was cheering up for their houses, I was looking only at her, with her head a bit leaned forward, telling me she was sad :(

Well, I exited the Audi in disgust and went to my classroom. Later, when I was passing by her class, I saw her head down. Something was happening inside me u know :/ I went to her, trying to console her.....Trying to be with her, giving her importance, telling her she was special and would win next year :) Finally, she smiled and i was satisfied. Well, we met again in my class, sat in the secret area :P And at the same time I just could not see my friend cry. Why did his girl have to hurt him like this? But, i trust mine, ofcourse :) So, we again sat in the Audi, but this time there was a Twist! She was wearing Blue uniform and was taken up to the balcony to sit. SHIT! I felt so restless wanting to go up ASAP! But, the great Maths teacher just not allowing me. But, like "Don ko 11 Mulkon ki police dhoond rahi hai, I escaped from him, and he could not find me"! :P :) Well, sat with her, talked again and this time. Fulfilled my promise. Did what I told you. And the look on her face making me even happier. She was definitely shy, even though she didn't accept the fact. But it was goooood! Trying to kinda' tease her during the National Anthem too, but didn't work out this time :P It's okay. There's a first time and next time. So, next time :)

BSF gave me these amazing 2 days! and I'm just waiting for more of such amazing functions.

Till then, hope for the best fella's! Coz "La Amo para siempre!" <3 The best thing ever happened to me was you ! Did u know that? Now do u know? So at around 8:15 a call came on my phone. First i thought of not picking it up, but I did. So it was you eh :) Talked, made me happy and I felt goooood! At the end of the call, you said that one line you say after every call but NEVER fulfill it :P "Accha, main kal tujhe call karungi abhi (whatsoever the reason may be :P)......Let's check it out tomorrow, Till then I'm going to sleep. Too much of writing ! Bye fella's. Sweet Dreams....Wait, I got some lines for ya princess, check 'em!

<3 I wrote your name in the sky, the wind blew it away.
I wrote your name in the sand, but the waves washed it away.
I've written your name in my heart, and forever it will stay! <3 Te amo :D (Now you know the meaning of this word, after my talk with you :)

My world.....

So, being the sequel to the previous blog, this one is about the MOST important people in my life.
They are the ones, who have picked me up when I fell down on the path of life, bunked classes with me, saved me from teachers and through all this Love and friendship, I have to call them -- MY WORLD.
So here are following Losers whom I consider big time fools but also the most important people.

1) Andy Garcia - An asshole. He is nothing else, but my brother and my best friend. You have always helped me man ( U pass because of me in exams :P) , be it with the one I love or counselling me. Also known as Justin Bieber, u kinda' look like him, but you're the bestest friend anyone could have maricon! I will miss u when u go back to Cuba :(

2) Sachin Khurana - The biggest "Nautanki" i have ever come across! This guy is really cute, making me laughing my guts out all the time! It's been 3 years now with him and I know him damn well. This particular creature can finish 4 lunch boxes before break with a guarantee! Awesome 2 point shooter in basketball and also my best Indian friend! He pisses me off sometimes but it's ok! CHALTA HAI.....I know our class teacher will be putting us in 2 different sections (they don't hurricanes like us together :D) i will still remember u brother :) My pornstar ;)

3) Janvi Mathur - The one who knows me best! It's just been a year I met this girl and I've never come so close to anybody as I have to her :) She is the cutest and most supporting friend u could have. Trust me on this! Chocaholic, she is mad. I repeat she is mad! Sometimes making me happy and sometimes very angry, but still i can't stay apart from a bestie! What more ? Always been with me and never turning her back against me . Pleasure to have such a friend actually! I have thousand of more words but if i write it I'm gonna get seriously bashed up by her. So all I can say, she is the best (kinda') female friend i have :)

4) Aman Mahajan- Mr. Athlete. This guy has always helped me so much in my life man! With my girl, life and random shit :) .....Bunking french periods, talking all day and rest. I hope we're in the same class next year :D I don't have words for you brother, so I won't write much..But, I love you man :)
Whenever u need me, I'll be there!
No worries, Amann is here :)

5) Prashant Chaudhary- Supporter. When I met this guy for the first time, he always fought with me 24X7 !! I never knew I would one day calling him my brother. My badminton partner and Love guru also !! This guy is the biggest support I have had for the past few years. Always helped me in fights, ultimate bike rides and we've had soooooo much fun together talking about random things!
He is the biggest and cutest and smartest and the coolest brother I have!
Luv u brother :)))))

My Life, My Love

It was a day which started with a problem. Bad start, bad day. I was in love with a girl, whom i considered my life. I wanted all the wrong guys to stay away from her. I knew she was not wrong but people thought she was. It's been a year I've known her and during this friendship I never realized when I fell for her. There have been many obstacles to get her, be close. Every time I had a problem which somehow related to her, I hated her. I met her on 5th December, 2010. I remember the day like it was yesterday. Remembering how she looked at me during the sports day practices, still makes me happy. Gives me another reason why I love sports day !! :P I had never imagined she would come so close to me and one day we'll be laughing our guts out, reminiscing about the day we met!

But, it never made me leave her! I am an ordinary boy, no special. I have been trying to do more than I can over the past 1 year, just for this girl. You know there's something special, which I haven't been able to figure out yet.

She had a boyfriend when I started liking her and thought if I could tell her he was wrong, using her.
I never could. One day, my best friend came running to me with a bright smile on his face, as if he just won a Lamborghini in a lottery. He told me she broke up. I was happy as well as sad because I didn't know how to react. be happy that I could be her next or be unhappy as i just couldn't see tears in her eyes. It hurted real bad.

I tried to get close to her, each day spend time, make her feel happy and special! Since then, she has been with 2 other guys, broken my heart, fixed it up again and never tried to make me feel sad. There are 3 Big guys who are after my life for her. They think I'm the reason for her not reacting or responding to them nicely. I can fight. I will. I've changed Big time since I've met her. I'm fighting for this girl, on the battlefield of Love.

I Love her and maybe she loves me too! Sometimes i get angry on her and we stop speaking for no reason. That makes me go mad. But, it can't change the fact I love her!
Hoping one day she'll be mine.
Hoping one day she'll be mine.
My name is Amanndeep Singh, an ordinary guy, who is in Love, who can do anything for that girl! :)